Klosterman

I love humorous essays, but good ones are hard to come by, especially since everyone blogs for free now anyway. I salivate over Dorothy Parker's reviews. I only read The Atlantic Monthly for Sandra Tsing Loh, whom I've actually met (I'm not saying this to brag. But it did make me very giddy!) And Sarah Vowell was the only thing that got me through traffic court. I was really giddy to discover Chuck Klosterman. After reading his essay on The Sims in Barnes & Noble, I was hooked, and I picked up Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs. Today, I saw a girl reading Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs, and just like the guy in that song Breakfast at Tiffany's says, I thought to myself, "Well, that's the one thing we got." But just because you both like a book (and how do I know she even liked the book. She could've been completely and totally disgusted by the book. Possession hardly means affection!), it doesn't mean you'll like each other or have anything else in common for that matter. I just knew if we spoke, red minus signs would appear over her head -- the double ones, where you've really fucked up -- the kind that only appear when you choose "slap" on someone you just met. And my social meter would be all red, and I'd wave to my sim god and beg for some interaction. Plus, I had somewhere to be.